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Patti and Molly
Member PageMember Page
Jan 11, 2016 at 09:17
(New York)
Post 377

Thank you for image of the week! Vote for this post

I got an email from Mark last night that one of the photos Theo was kind enough to post for me won image of the week. That gave me a smile. I don't know if I've ever won anything before, and the fact that you all voted for my sweet girl was so touching. Thank you!!!

Molly's breathing is going downhill. One side of her nostrils seems to be completely plugged by the tumor's growth. We went to the urgent care vet clinic yesterday (part of my normal veterinarian hospital - they also emergency appointments on Saturday and Sundays). The vet said there is a super-strong anti-flammatory we can try that might help. Obviously it's a long shot, but hey, we don't seem to have anything to lose by trying.

The vet agreed she doesn't seem to be in pain. I know that, I know my girl and as brutal as this situation is being on my heart, I'm seeing her with clear eyes if that makes any sense at all.

I asked her to talk to me about how will we know when it's time. She said since we have the pain so well controlled, it's likely going to come down to her stopping eating. She said as the tumor grows it is likely to completely plug her nose. She said it's like having a cold for humans, when you nostrils are plugged you can breathe through your mouth - but she said it's hard to eat and drink that way, and that's the point most dogs give up.

And that's the point I started crying. Of course. I can fake holding it together pretty well most of the time, but the tears are always just beneath the surface.

And of course, I have to travel to NYC for work this week. I'm supposed to be in our NYC office Tuesday through Friday this week. I really don't want to go, but I missed so much stinking time with the last 12 months of Alzheimer's and Hospice issues with dad that I feel like I can't skip out on this stupid trip.

I talked to Steve and he's ok with me going. He can take that last horrible trip to the vets without me if need be. (NYC is 4 hours away from me, and I use public transportation to get there. So it could be 8 hours or so before I could get home on an "emergency" basis - and I won't make her wait that long if she's suffering.)

I suppose there is a small hope this super-duper anti-inflammatory will slow things down long enough we might be able to buy another week with her - but my head tells me that may not be possible.

Lastly, again, I don't know how to thank all of you for all of your tender messages. They make me cry. But as I keep saying, I swear to God you guys are a big part of what's getting me through this. That, and we found a puppy. We won't be bringing that bundle of happiness home until probably March, and obviously Molly won't make it long enough to meet her little sister. So on one hand I know there is a very happy thing waiting for me a few weeks from now, but first I need to sustain having my heart broken. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for putting up with all my sad messages on here. Writing it out, and knowing people who care read this and feel my pain, does help a smidge. I appreciate your willingness to share a few tears with me more than I can explain.


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Sir William
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Jan 11, 2016 at 10:42
• Allen
(New Jersey)

Post 1409

Re: Thank you for image of the week! Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Patti
Please know we are crying along with you. We will pray that the medicine will work for a while. I am praying that you get back from NYC and your girl is there to meet you.
My God find the time to help you and Molly and your husband through this.

All our love Sir William ^--^ and Allen

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Jeanie & Annabel
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Jan 11, 2016 at 10:54
• Jeanie
(Indiana)

Post 3426

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You know how much Annabel and I love you, Patti.  We are right there with you in spirit.  You WILL make it home in time....it just HAS to be that way.

Love and hugs,
Jeanie and Annabel

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Moshe & Levi
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Jan 11, 2016 at 11:05
• Yoka
(Florida)

Post 14244

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Oh Patty what a rotten time that you have to go to NY for work . I pray that the new medication will help for a while and hope you be back home. It is so hard when you know the time is coming soon. I am not as good as you putting it in words English is after all my second language.
Molly is so adorable.God grant you strenght to help you and your husband .How wonderful that a pup will be waiting for your love. I know they never will replace Maggie but each one is different.
Please keep us posted and we will continue to pray.
Love,Moshe,Levi and Yoka
Xxx

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Casey
Email
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Jan 11, 2016 at 11:45
• Theo
(Canada)

Post 2924

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Congratulations Molly on being IOW :) This is just the most adorable picture ever ;)

Patti, as Allen said, we are all with you on this journey. A little late now, but have you talked to your boss about sending someone else? I can't imagine Steve having to make that final trip without you, but if needs be, we'll be here for him. Your trip to NY couldn't have come at a worse time, but I have a strong feeling that Molly will be waiting for you when you get home, with tail wagging and her usual big smile. As Jeanie said, it just HAS to be that way.

I hope the anti-inflammatory works really well and keeps Molly's airway clear. We've seen what a fighter she is and it is only four days. If she is having difficulty eating, how about baby food that she can lick up, or chicken broth for food and fluids?

I also hope that Molly will meet her new sister, she will be so happy to know you will have another furbaby to look after your heart and when the time does come, I know Molly will be looking down and guiding this little one along.

Much love, Theo


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Patti and Molly
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Jan 11, 2016 at 12:21
(New York)
Post 378

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Allen, Jeanie, Yoka, and Theo - bless you.

Jeanie, you've been with me on this sad ride, and knowing what hell you're going through makes me appreciate your messages a little bit more. It can be so hard when your own heart is filled with sadness to take on someone else's situation too.

About the trip - the decision is mine. But I've found out the world doesn't stop spinning when you're sad. I took a fair amount of time off when dad was sick, and my work just waits for me when I'm gone. So I come back to a mountain of things that need doing and that just adds to my stress.

I keep thinking Molly is down to her final days. But heck, I've thought that like 4 times now, and she always bounces back. So I don't know. I've pushed this trip off long enough now. I'd need to reschedule it for another week or two. What if she's still with us then and we're REALLY down to the wire? I can't keep putting my life on hold and this is a good time for Steve and my schedules. So I'm just going to hope the anti-inflammatory buys us another few days.

She's a total daddy's girl. She loves me, but her world revolves around her daddy. He is "her" person. I want to be there, for her, AND for him. But my clear head tells me he's the most important one to her, and so.....off I go, with fingers' crossed.

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Casey
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Jan 11, 2016 at 12:28
• Theo
(Canada)

Post 2929

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That is what I was thinking too Patti, I'm sure she'll be greeting you when you get home and you have no need to worry as you know Steve will be giving her all his best.

warm hugs to you both, Theo

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Patti and Molly
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Jan 11, 2016 at 12:39
(New York)
Post 379

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Steve would walk through fire for his girl. There's a reason I married him, and it's because he is a dog person with a kind heart.

He'll take exceptionally good care of her so I don't worry about that. And to be honest, she could care less if I'm not there. Just more space for her in the bed at night. ;)

If he goes out of town, she cries for him. She sits in that chair and looks up the road waiting for him. It breaks my heart.

If I go out of town, apparently she barely notices my absence. And I love her with my whole heart and soul anyway. :)



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NimbySue
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Jan 11, 2016 at 15:58
(United Kingdom)
Post 15637

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Steve sounds Like Peter ...he would do anything for our puppers also...Please know we are with you Patti..everyday I wish I could spend all the time with mine and not have to go to work...I miss them even though I am just down the lane...We  are praying Molly will wait for you  to return on Friday...Big Hugs Annie and Gang xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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Mr.Willie
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Jan 11, 2016 at 15:59
• Sandra
(Nevada)

Post 5954

Re: Thank you for image of the week! Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Congrats on the IOW ...I love Molly's sweet expression in that picture!!
It's good news that her pain is being controlled so well and Molly is hanging in with some good days. Keeping good thoughts for your little sweetheart that the anti-inflammatory med does well for her. 

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Deb, Emmie, and Angel Kelsie
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Jan 11, 2016 at 17:52
• Deborah
(Pennsylvania)

Post 8214

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Love that picture of Molly. It breaks my heart to think of what's to come and hoping like the devil that the new meds can buy some time. Keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, Deb, Emmie, and Angel Kelsie

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Iver and Sailor
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Jan 11, 2016 at 21:15
• David
(Washington)

Post 6261

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Such a sweet picture of Molly
I'm sorry you have to go on a trip Patti
Like the others have said, I'm sure Molly
will be waiting for you when you come home
It just HAS to be.
Stay strong through all of this Patti
When I lost Iver, it broke my heart
I miss him terribly but it brings me some joy
knowing he is healed of all his illnesses
I'm so glad you are getting another Westie in March
Have a safe trip to NYC

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Toby and Suzie's Mom
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Jan 12, 2016 at 08:26
• Mary Ann
(Virginia)

Post 1969

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We are all  with you and Molly on this journey.  My Heart is just breaking for you all.  We are sending you our prayers, love and strength.

Mary Ann, Toby and Suzie














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Patti and Molly
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Jan 12, 2016 at 11:02
(New York)
Post 380

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David, Mary Ann, Deb, Sandra, and Annie - thank you for all of your kind words. I read everything everyone takes the time to write, and it gives me comfort.

We really are a special little corner of the internet here.

Diana - I saw your post on my other thread. I did get a chance to talk with my vet about it all. It's hard, because she's not in pain, per se. So it's a quality of life thing. I see in her eyes that she's starting to give up. :( She's not quite as happy, she will play but only for short spurts now. She's definitely sliding down hill.

I look in those beautiful little eyes, and I see a beautiful little girl who is getting close to having had enough. :( She's not quite there yet. So I told her when I left this morning that I'll be back on Friday, and I'm hoping she can hang in there long enough for that. But I also told her I'll understand if she can't - that I love her more than I've ever loved any dog in my whole life, she's been an awesome, amazing girl, and I was blessed to be her mom for 12 wonderful years.

And then I cried. :(

Wow this has been a painful journey. :(

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Casey
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Jan 12, 2016 at 17:33
• Theo
(Canada)

Post 2937

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Just three days to go Patti... I welled up in tears reading your last paragraph, how beautiful and understanding. Keeping the prayers going that she makes it through till you get home.

love and warm hugs, Theo

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Charleen And Matthew
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Jan 12, 2016 at 21:50
• Charleen
(South Dakota)

Post 12488

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Been thinking of you and Molly so much, and crying with you. Good to hear that you're able to manage her pain and that she's feeling ok.  Wish you didn't have to go out of town but hopefully she will be waiting for you when you get back.  So glad you're getting a puppy so soon! Life is too short to spend any of it not having a Westie. 

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