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Update from Patti and Molly Reply to this Message

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Casey
Email
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Jan 21, 2016 at 18:45
• Theo
(Canada)

Post 2958

Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post

Patti said she would try to get on TC soon and post, I think she is having a difficult time right now..

From Patti....

What a sad, weird journey this has been. Monday night Molly seemed sad, low energy. The tumor is growing so fast now, it's taken over most of the left side of her face. So Steve and I talked, and we both cried like babies....and agreed it was time. So we decided to make an appointment for Wednesday (yesterday), knowing we could take her in on an emergency basis at any time if need be.

Tuesday we got up and she seemed a smidge better. Steve went home at lunch and said she looked much better - was eating, playing in the snow, and seemed happy again. Tuesday night when I pulled in the driveway coming home after work, the first thing I saw was a joyous Molly running laps around Steve and barking her fool head off. She was JOYOUS in the new snow.

She continues to act like a happy puppy. Barking for us to play with her, tracking moles outside in the snow, wagging, arooing at the people in the neighborhood. So obviously I cancelled the Wednesday appointment, because there's no way I'm taking a dog in to be put to sleep when she's wagging and happy.

Her face and eye look like hell. I can't believe how happy she is in spite of it though. I know this dog, I know her emotions, and I know when she's not happy or in pain. She is doing fine at the moment, but I also know that will sooner or later change. The cancer is spreading upward in her skin, and it's starting to loop around the outside corner of her eye. Her physical appearance is shockingly bad. But she doesn't know that, so I keep telling her what a beautiful girl she is, and she wags back at me and tells me "thanks, I know!"

I'm trying to treasure the happiness and accept the fact that it will end when it will end. What's that trite phrase - people make plans and God laughs? Well, I thought she'd be gone by now - and instead she barked for 5 minutes after Steve left for work this morning because she wanted to go back outside and keep tracking that mole who is leaving tracks near our house.

I honestly feel bad to just keep posting my sad updates though. My heart is so sad and so heavy about Molly that I feel like I'm a grey cloud hovering over everyone, and I try to remain involved there when I don't have a post active myself....



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Sir William
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Jan 21, 2016 at 19:27
• Allen
(New Jersey)

Post 1424

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Just let her know we are here for her and we know how difficult a time and are praying for her and Molly.

I think of her and Molly every day and hope they can get through one day at a time.

All our love Sir William ^--^ and Allen

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Deb, Emmie, and Angel Kelsie
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Jan 21, 2016 at 19:42
• Deborah
(Pennsylvania)

Post 8232

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

We are keeping all of you in our thoughts and prayers. Every day is a gift from God and we do with it the best we can. Cherish this time you have with Molly--we are here whenever you need us. Never underestimate the courage and heart of a terrier.......
Love, Deb, Emmie, and Angel Kelsie

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Sandi and Maksim
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Jan 21, 2016 at 21:19
• Sandi
(Pennsylvania)

Post 9142

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

My heart is breaking for her. Please let her know she is in my thoughts and prayers.

Love
Sandi and Maks

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Caesar and Murphy Latham
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Jan 21, 2016 at 21:21
• Louise
(Illinois)

Post 5015

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Tell Patti we are here for her and Molly and her are in our thoughts.  Molly is a gift and Patti needs to continue doing what she is doing.  Enjoy every pleased minute with her, she is just precious.  Love Louise, Caesar and Angel Murphy at the Bridge

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Iver and Sailor
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Jan 21, 2016 at 22:08
• David
(Washington)

Post 6273

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Tell Patti that I know how sad she is knowing the day
will come when it is Molly's time.
But I'm so glad to hear that Molly is still active and happy.
Tell Patti that none of us mind sharing that awful cloud over her head
that we all have gone through what she is going through
and we will be here to support her.
Hugs for Pattie and Molly

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Gracie aka White Bullet
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Jan 22, 2016 at 05:40
• Ellen
(Connecticut)

Post 6356

  
Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Don't feel bad posting this. We are here for you. I'd do as you are. When it's time you will know. For now, treasure the moments.

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Katy ^~^
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Jan 22, 2016 at 07:26
• Jennifer
(Minnesota)

Post 2216

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

We think of them every day - and cry for them too.  We are always here for each other - now and when that dreaded day comes.  Know that so many of us are here for you.
Jennifer and Katy ^~^

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Patti and Molly
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Jan 22, 2016 at 09:29
(New York)
Post 383

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

I'm just so sorry everyone.

I don't know what to say anymore. I've been so sad for so long now, and I've whined so much I'm sick of hearing it myself. So I don't want to come here and post yet another sad, pathetic whine about how much it sucks.

I'm watching the dog who is the love of my life be consumed, slowly, by a cancerous tumor spreading over her beautiful face. It's an open, oozing, smelling mess. If I posted a picture you would be horrified.

But she's still happy! Again, I hope you believe me that she's not living in misery. She is eating well, playing well, sleeping well, happy, running around and greeting her friends outside, digging in the snow, barking in happiness.

So I should be happy right?

But I'm not.

While Molly seems to be clueless about what this all means, it's breaking my heart. And after the 12 months of misery with Dad's alzheimer's and hospice situation, I don't have any emotional reserves to draw upon anymore.

So I feel bad coming here and just dumping my misery on everyone else. I'm hanging on by a thread, just trying to get through the day at work takes everything I have right now. With dad's situation, I qualified for all sorts of leave provisions. There is no leave for this. And I'm pretty sure people at work are sick of this too. They lived with my intermittent absences for the last 12 months because of dad, so I've about tapped out the good will available here.

It just freaking sucks.

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Iver and Sailor
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Jan 22, 2016 at 11:54
• David
(Washington)

Post 6275

Patti Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

No need to apologize.
We are all here for you.
I'm sorry you and Molly are going through all this
It is very hard to see a loved one become sick
and then pass on, much less two loved ones in 12 months
We are here for you and Molly.
I'm so glad she is so happy.
I hope she stays that way for a long time

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Deb, Emmie, and Angel Kelsie
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Jan 22, 2016 at 11:07
• Deborah
(Pennsylvania)

Post 8233

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Patti, please don't feel guilty about sharing your thoughts with us. Most of us have gone through similar experiences with our furbabies and our hearts are breaking for all of you. We're here, we care, enough said.
Love, Deb, Emmie, and Angel Kelsie

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Sherrie
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Jan 22, 2016 at 10:28
• Sherrie
(Florida)

Post 400

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

You don't need to apologize.  What you are going through is the most terrible situation, and the stress must be unbelievable.  I know what you mean about not having the time off of work for things that life will throw at you, also. 

When it's clear to me when "it's time" for one of my pups to go, then it's still awful, but you KNOW it's the right thing to do.  I suffer the most with the grey area....when it's not clear, and when a decision must be made.   As I've often said, we (thankfully) do not have to make these life and death decisions for humans (usually, but there are exceptions), so we are off the hook from the guilt for the most part. 

You will know in your heart when it's the right time.  Also know that she is one lucky pup to have such a loving home.

Sherrie



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Patti and Molly
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Jan 22, 2016 at 12:05
(New York)
Post 384

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Sherrie your words really touched me.

I know everyone here understands, and you all do give me great comfort because we all say things differently, and sometimes you all are able to find words that elude me.

You nailed it. It's the grey area that's killing me. It's the never-ending second-guessing of, is today time, is she still happy "enough", how is she doing, should I be doing something different....

I know some day soon I'm going to have to do something that will hurt so bad it defies explanation. I don't want to do that one second before I have to - and yet the watching/waiting is eating me up inside.

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Mr.Willie
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Jan 22, 2016 at 09:42
• Sandra
(Nevada)

Post 5986

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Patti,most of us here have lost a terrier to illness so we know just how painful this journey can be...we know your sadness. Thinking of you and Molly everyday...sending our hugs to you both! 

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Toby and Suzie's Mom
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Jan 22, 2016 at 12:23
• Mary Ann
(Virginia)

Post 1973

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

That's why we are all here, to listen, be a shoulder to cry on and help one another get thru the bad times.  And to share the good times.  And both are always intertwined.  We will always be here for everyone who needs us.

As long as Molly is eating and playing, she's happy.  And that is what we want for our babies.  Molly doesn't know she's sick - that's the best thing.  She's going to live her life as she wants. 

Toby, Suzie and I continue to pray for you all. 


Mary Ann, Toby and Suzie


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NimbySue
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Jan 22, 2016 at 12:31
(United Kingdom)
Post 15668

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Patti,Please keep posting,we are here for you and we have had our times when we are full of sadness and heartache  with our puppers...we are a great solid family here at TC with Big Thank you to Mark for creating it...so we develop a bond between us from our love of Terriers...Molly will let you know...I have had times when I knew the time was very near to say goodbye to one of mine and they seem to know and start living like they were pups again zooming around...its haertbreaking knowing what you will be going through but please know you are in our thoughts all through this time  and waiting you have to go through and we will be here as strong as ever when that day comes for you and Molly...I have tears tyring this as we seem to re live what we have been through in the past also but that's the way it is ...Our Deep Love and Bond with our Dogs....Hugs and Please give Molly a Kiss from us all.Annie and Gang xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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janet
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Jan 22, 2016 at 13:06
• JANET
(United Kingdom)

Post 2352

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

a lovely posting!  


jan x


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Casey
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Jan 22, 2016 at 14:44
• Theo
(Canada)

Post 2968

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

See Patti, I said YOU were not the dark cloud, we all understand, it is the cancer and we are here to help you through this. 

One thing though, that most of us have not had to deal with is seeing with our own eyes, what is taking our wee lovie... seeing it, caring for it and knowing we cannot stop it 

Thank you Patti for being such a wonderful Mom to Molly, and despite the visuals, letting her have this wonderful time with you and Steve. You are very special terrier people and we all love you for that.

much love, Theo

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Patti and Molly
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Jan 22, 2016 at 14:54
(New York)
Post 385

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Annie, I'm crying. I'm so touched by what you just said. Thank you so much.

And Theo, you too have been so kind to me throughout all of this.

I will try harder to remain a presence here. This is indeed a special place.

Again, the good news is that there is a little Westie girl out there who will be coming to me, her forever home, in a few weeks. Her name is going to be Allie, and she will become a member here as soon as she's in my arms. So we'll have fun puppy stuff to look forward to soon.

In the meantime, as long as I know I'm not bringing you all down too much, I'll post some updates about Molly as things change. Just bear with me though, because most of what I can post about Molly is filled with grief and sadness. It all starts to sound the same after awhile....

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Charleen And Matthew
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Jan 23, 2016 at 23:26
• Charleen
(South Dakota)

Post 12495

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Patti, don't feel bad about expressing how you feel.  We want to hear from you.  I came on this evening to see if there was an update from you.  As usual, I don't have words to tell you how sorry I am about all you're going through.  Just know that you and Molly are in my thoughts every day.


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Caesar and Murphy Latham
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Jan 24, 2016 at 21:31
• Louise
(Illinois)

Post 5020

Re: Update from Patti and Molly Vote for this post Reply to this Message Reply with a quote

Patti you are such a wonderful mother to Molly.  As long as she is happy that is wonderful and she is living the life she wants to live with you.  Remember she is a true "terrier".  They are strong, tough and determined.  They want what they want and will fight very hard for it.  Keep us posted when you can.  You and Molly are always in my prayers and thoughts.  Louise, Caesar and Ange; Murphy at the Bridge

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